Reflection

Today is more of a reflection post, a little different than my normal :)

Something I learned this morning in my daily devotional. My daily devotional is something I've been working at getting into for a long time. I just needed a schedule. I'm a creature of a schedule. Didn't know if habit was quite the right word for this situation.

Throw me off my schedule... I'm lost like a little puppy. My day is all ruined.

Good think Baby D is NOT going to mess this up. Who am I kidding! I'm doomed.

Anyways, so right now every morning I wake up at 6:30am, shower, grab a 1/2 cup of coffee, and read the Bible. I've been working my way through the old testament for some time now. Genesis - great. Exodus - great. Leviticus and Numbers - AHHHH how painstakingly boring. But if you read the study notes in a Study Bible... little more helpful. But still boring. I almost gave up. Deuteronomy kind of kicked up a notch but then Joshua and Judges way better. Now I'm on Samuel. I've always wanted to know more about the Judges and Kings era in the Bible.

Okay to what I learned. I was reading about Saul, David and Johnathan. Quick background. Saul was King. Johnathan was Saul's son. David and Johnathan were best friends. Saul was rejected by God as a King for his selfish disobedience and God was appointing David to be the next King. David was also one of Saul's greatest army commanders. Because God found favor with David, Saul became extremely jealous. His jealousy eventually led to trying to find ways of killing David. Even trying to get Johnathan to kill David. But Johnathan was loyal to David and even more important loyal to God first. Thus helping spare David's life.

Note - Jealousy... bad. Loyalty... good.

This started a reflection in my own life. Who have I been jealous of? Who have a lacked loyalty to?

As a teenage girl, jealousy rampaged through my life. she's way prettier, her boyfriend is way hotter, I want her hair, I hate how everyone likes her, I was probably even jealous how she wasn't a jealous person. Oh the life of a teenage girl. Anyone have tips on how I can spare Baby D from this?

Anyways, jealousy still creeps in too often. And when jealousy becomes extreme it leads you to think negatively and then eventually say things that you'll regret which then in return may make you do certain things you aren't proud of. (been there)

How do you fight jealousy? Look to whom your loyalty is to. Is it to yourself? Your success? Or is it God? If it's to God first, like Johnathan, you'll be able to fight those jealousy feelings and put your friends, family even foes first and feel sincerely happy for them in all situations. In return you will be happy with who you are as a person. (working on this)

I don't know what lead me to want to post about this today. But time and time again I've been clunked on the head with the notion that God should come first. Sermon: Love God more so you can love others more... aka your children. Bible: Put your loyalty to God first so you can be more loyal to others... aka be a better and happier person.

It might also be the fact that the last sentence of the study part of my Bible was do people know where your loyalty lies?

Sadly probably not.

Sadly did I know? probably not.

But now I know where it should be.